little things have been reminding me of traveling. the rain. seeing los amigos invisibles. windy days. looking at photos. i'm itching to leave. i need a break from all this but it seems so far away with my financial burdens. then there is finding a new place and that's expensive too. seems like places start at a grand a bedroom.

i feel run down. i've been working out a lot and it shows which is nice. i am congested and my ear is kinda wonky. i djed a house party on saturday and now i can't hear so well out of my left ear. not sure if it's congestion or what since sometimes when i yawn i hear quite well. i've always needed to be careful about loud music though, but i never remember to bring ear plugs. i guess this is a wake up call.

i've been doing some side design lately. just finished a website for a jewelry artist and some stuff for burning man. i haven't really been doing much for anything personal lately. i really want to learn how to compose music. i'm guessing ableton live will be the best first program to learn on. i've been slowly writing down ideas and lyrics to songs that i hope one day come out of speakers in some club.

once again i am single. i'm not sure what really happened. i feel like it was a dream since it came and went so fast. i wasn't ready for how fast it all went. it was like i was on the sidelines watching it from afar. i felt disengaged but at the same time it was too much. kinda like a tornado. it's so loud it's almost quite.

i wish the weather wasn't so messed up. it should be snowing a lot more up in tahoe, but not until last weekend did it see a large dump of snow all season. it rained at some resorts and now only have the resorts have good conditions.

i'm hoping to start a creative forum that will coincide with watching lost on wednesday nights. it just seems like there used to be a lot more random acts of creativity among my friends and now with our bust lives we need to dedicate time to be creative. maybe some awesome things will come of it. i see movies. songs. parties. gadgets. and other neat projects. i'm calling it "lost hideout" and it's open to all who want to collaborate on a personal or group project.

and what happened to creating an art car for burning man? where is it all going? the time. the money. the creativity... it seems like it's all slipping through my fingers faster than i can find it. we had so much fun last year on the art car. it will be a bummer not to have another one this year. so many ideas it's hard to remember them all and almost impossible to execute any of them. mobil stoop party. electropolis. office camp. bill burner. so the idea is that we make more money later in life and we'll have more time... right? will we lose motivation by then?